Friday, May 30, 2008


$83.79 later and I have a New power box thingy. Battery Boy said that those things "never wear out". K, so mine did. 4 months after getting new laptop. I am lucky like that.

2 clients came in today and I was telling them about my new BFF, Teresa. They both "love" her. One had been at the Mexican place earlier in the evening and had very bad service by St. Teresa.
So it wasn't just me being a bi-otch. I love to be right!

I had to miss the SATC premiere. Sad day, but sometimes being a Mom has to take center stage. (J had an All Star baseball game tonight.) I got the slightly tipsy phone call letting me know what I was missing. They wanted me to jump in the car and get there. Now. Unfortunately, not happening.

Baseball tournaments tomorrow from 10am-8pm. Ask me about my sunburn tomorrow night.

Not again...

I am going to be in serious mourning this weekend.

The power supply went out on my laptop. (At least that is what I am hoping!)
I was online yesterday for a while and then the boys played for a while. When Paint boy got home last night, he wasn't able to even turn the laptop on. So sad!

I am off to the Battery store today with lots of prayer (and willingness to pay any amount of money) for a new power cord/battery.

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Dear Teresa,

I understand that you work at the local Mexican restaurant and you might be new around here, but I would like to explain how our country works. The Customer is ALWAYS Right! This is part of our Bill of Rights, right after Bearing arms and a woman's Right to Vote. I believe it's the 28th Amendment.

When I order the "Homemade Sangria" and complain that it tastes off, please don't tell me "that they opened a new bottle just for me". I ordered it because of the "Homemade" part, not the watered down cheap wine taste. Just take the pitcher away and offer to bring me something else. I know the margaritas are strong and tasty, I expected the same from your Sangria.

Next, when I order my steak burrito ( that I always order) do NOT come around the table and start stabbing my menu with your finger. Your statement about "wanting to make sure, so that I don't send that back, too" was way out of line. I swear that my eyes were going to pop out of my head, but I didn't want to embarrass myself in front of my new friends.

Seriously, could you have carried more than one item at a time to our table? We would not have run you like a retriever if you brought everything at once. It took a Village to serve our table.

Hair Girl

P.S. When someone (not me) orders a Diet Coke with limes and needs a refill on said Diet Coke, that usually means they want new limes. Not the old, squeezed ones from the last refill. Bring new limes. I'm just sayin'.

Monday, May 26, 2008

Oh No!

For the last 3 years I have recorded all the shows I watch with a DVR. I can't watch regular live TV. I must fast forward through commercials. It has allowed me to watch a lot more tv than I ever have before. Good and Bad! I am a reality show junkie.

While sick on the couch Friday night, lightning struck my precious DVR.
After an hour on the phone with the Direct TV people, they set up a service appointment.
My new DVR arrived this morning. They used to pull the programming card from your old machine and stick it in the new one. All your programs saved and you were ready to go. Not so much! New card= new machine. I got Nothing! No shows, no movies, no schedule.

I am sad...

"Follies" of adult women

2008 brought the 75th year of the JL in my town. To commemorate the event, we decided to honor 75 women in our community that have made a difference. They were to be honored at a Spring concert/Follies event. It was a long year developing the idea and event.

At the April meeting they asked for volunteers to sign up to perform to one number.
They also held a "Wine and Cheese Tasting." Free wine and black truffle cheese. Yummy! I KNOW that they planned this. No way are sane women going to agree to dance in front of an audience. June Cleaver talked 3 of us from MM into performing with her. One month later. 4 practices to perform in front of an audience... HOLY CRAP!

Who knew that this is what our future held? The 4 Mistle-toads and next year's President!

Our first day of practice, we all had to stretch. And try out. Yes, I said try out. For something we volunteered to do.
They placed us into groups based on dance ability! Yikes! June deemed them the "Eagles, Cougars and Turtles."
I was disappointed that I wasn't in the Eagles (until I found out that they had multiple numbers!) I became a Cougar- and prayed not to mess up.

We practiced and practiced. To Kool and the Gang's "Celebrate". I just don't like that song so much any more. 3 practices and we still didn't know the whole routine. Remember, we are JLers, soccer moms, average age 34. The future didn't look to good.
The dress rehearsal.
Look, all our feet are off the floor at the same time. We might actually have a chance at this. This is the night where we learned the end of the routine. 3 days before we were to perform.
Notice the flat wigs. They were HUGE! We were told to bring pantyhose stuffed with batting to help hold them up. Put the panty part on our heads and wrapped the sausage stuffed legs around and around. It could possibly be one of the funniest things I have seen in a long time!
Here are some of the Eagles performing with the band. These are the girls that knew what the heck they were doing. They were always in the spotlight, so hopefully all eyes were on them.

Here we are mid routine. It was the shortest 2 1/2 minutes of my life. I was counting and concentrating on smiling the whole time. Notice how large the wigs are here?
BTW, that is my large butt in this picture. Paint boy only got shots of my back.
Here we all our in all of our 70's disco glory! I am the one in the blond wig.

We all agreed to wear our outfits to the Annual Halloween party. So be prepared, you will see this look again. It will free up the husbands to get really creative. (I know some of y'all are thinking that Halloween is a long way off. Around these parts, we all start planning our costumes early Summer. Paint boy and I have been know to make a pact that we will have decided on our costume before coming home from the Summer beach trip. This year we are all set. We have decided on costumes and its still May!)
Don't think for a minute that PB is going to come as a 70's disco boy! The man lives all year for "his" party. Any chance to wear makeup. Just Kidding!

We all agreed it was so much fun. I got to know some girls a lot better and laughed a lot with my friends. I don't regret my "Follies" for a moment.

Friday, May 23, 2008

Are you kidding me?

So it is a little more than allergies.

I have thrown up 3 times. WTH?

Isn't this May, who gets the stomach flu in May? I had to leave work yesterday at 10:30 am. I slept from 11 to 3pm. I then went back to sleep from 4- 6pm. Thank Heavens that J didn't burn down the house! Good Boy!

I tried to get up and go to work today, but I was sweating with a fever still. Not going to happen. I have been on the couch since 9 am.
I am progressing; yesterday- bed, today- couch.

BTW- Last day of School! I can't decide if I am excited or not...

Thursday, May 22, 2008

I am claiming medicine head

Have you ever had that feel of your head floating above your body while taking allergy pills? That, my friends is Medicine Head!

Paint Boy called me this morning and told me he forgot his laptop! Ma-jah crisis!

I promised to "bring it to him on my way to work, in about 15 minutes."
K, I totally forgot! In 15 minute span I forgot the laptop at the house.

Not a Happy Paint Boy!

Pass the Kleenex

Sorry that I haven't posted this week; I am suffering from some serious allergies.

In ATL, early Spring brings a cloud of yellow and pollen counts in the 3000 range. If you haven't ever experienced it, you would be amazed. The pine pollen covers everything with thick yellow dust. You literally can see clouds of pollen rolling down the road.When it finally rains, yellow rivers run into gutters.
I am not allergic to pine. I don't have issues until the pollen count gets down to 50-80. Everyone else has recovered and I am just getting started.
Welcome to my week!
My eyes are watering, I am sneezing up a storm and I can't breathe.

It is also the last week of school. Exams, for the first time, with C are stressing him out. 5 exams that could change his grade from A's to B's. Major percentage of every class grade!
J has checked out and decided that he is finished with Kindergarten.

I am not a very happy Mommy this week.

Monday, May 19, 2008

Its Raining in the Dining Room

As I was fixing dinner tonight, Paint boy noticed B; the 16 year old from next door, running up and down the street.

Just as we were sitting down to eat the doorbell rings. It's B, and he is totally rattled.
B-"Mr. Paint boy, um, there is water coming out of the ceiling. Could you come look?"
Pb- "Dude, where are your parents?"
B- "They are out on their walk and I need help NOW."

Paint boy runs up to their house and I grab all the beach towels from the linen closet.
As I walk into their house, I can hear rushing water. I mean Niagara Falls. I send the boys back to my house for buckets and I start moving furniture and emptying the room.. .
Paint boy turns the water off in the Master bath and the power to the whole house. (One of the pipes broke under the double sink.)
The water is rushing out of the vents, coming through the chandelier and all the seams in the drywall ceiling were dripping. I have never seen anything like it.
About this time the parents get back. They freak out. The mom is in tears and the dad freezes. I try to talk them off the ledge with terms like,"redecorate, new furniture, new carpet..." It was just too much for her, she wasn't listening to anything but the rushing water.
About 2 hours after the waterfall started, we were down to a slow drip. (Do you understand that Paintboy turned off the water and for 2 hours water came out of the ceiling! How long had it been broken and pouring into the master bath to continue to run for two hours out of the ceiling?) They had finally gotten in touch with a water damage company and help was on the way.
B came to our house for a shower, since a teenage boy needs light to shower. Mom and Dad are staying home from work tomorrow to deal with all the chaos involved with insurance and repair people.
I mentioned to Paint boy that I need a new dining room table and if I should be so lucky as to have a leak, I would let the water sit on the table to warp it. Of course, in all his wisdom he pointed out, that we have a bedroom over our dining room and if our master had a leak; I would be getting a new family room. Semantics!

Thursday, May 15, 2008

The Lawyer's wife deals crack!

I am telling you that this woman is a pusher and I am a customer for life!

I know that the Lawyer's wife loves some "retail therapy". No one is as crazy as the amount of "therapy" this woman gets. I listened, with all of you, as she blogged about the Cynthia Rowley Whim collection at Target. I looked at her pictures and thought ,"Oh, how cute!" I went on about my day.

Yesterday, I went to Target.
I walked onto the aisle and the "Hallelujah Chorus" started playing and then it transformed into a Gospel choir singing "Oh, Happy day!" I am not kidding you.
I started loading my cart and all I could here was Gospel music and seagulls. BTW -there are NO seagulls in ATL.

These are the plates that my sweet boys will eat their lunch on, all summer. Paint boy does not do paper plates, its usually china regardless if takeout or home cooked.
I got really cute green and white bowls and the small plastic green and blue cups to match. As close to disposable as I will get.

How cute is this cooler? It holds 16 cans and has a snack compartment on top. Perfect for the pool! The boys picked this one.
The cutest canvas tote evah! I am in love with the lime and blue stripes, can you tell?!?? Perfect for life, pool, beach, etc. Anywhere that little people ask me to hold their stuff.

We picked up a set of Lacrosse sticks and a really cool ladder ball game for the back yard and the beach. The boys played ladder ball while in AZ and thought it "was the funnest game ever!" I hope the 7 minis don't kill each other with the rope ball thingies at the beach. Someone will definitely get bonked in the head with a lacrosse stick, though.

The Whim line is all about the outdoors and entertaining. They have a line of cocktail mixers that were too fun to pass up. I selected the "bucket variety" These go into the freezer.
"You boys go grab a Popsicle. Mommy is going to drink/eat her yummy Sangria Slushy!" 3 bottles of red wine and this mix into the freezer, dip your glass in the peach sugar and spoon frozen concoction into glass. I might be able to survive the August heat!

I came home with a trunk load of goodies on Wednesday.
Today, I went back.
C and J had to pick out their beach towels to be monogrammed. That's my excuse and I am sticking to it!
I can go back tomorrow if one of y'all need me to pick something up. wink,wink

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Let me introduce

my friend 'Ssippi girl. She comes from an old 'Ssippi family, y'all from those parts would know her Daddy. I have been honored (and rolled on the floor with laughter), with the stories of her family and upbringing.

One of my all time favorites is- "During election years, she, her sisters and momma would have to park their luxury cars in the barn and drive older model American. Daddy's new truck got parked and the ooooold truck got brought out to campaign. Everyone in town knew that they had the other vehicles, but it was all about appearances. She can't count how many times that old truck broke down when they were going door to door."

This girl can tell a story and when you first meet her you wonder how much could be true. You then get to know her well, after a few cocktails and you know its ALL true. She is a riot.
'Ssippi is married to Metro. He is an old Southern gentleman, however he is all about his hair and toes. (Let's just say that Metro Man spends some cash at my salon!)

'Ssippi has 2 darling boys. One is fresh out as you can tell by the photo.
Both boys have double names , just not on purpose. Her oldest goes by FirstnameLastname. One word. Her baby is supposed to be doubled up too. We will have to wait and see on that one.

(BTW- She is going to kill me for the prego picture, but she is not as big as a minute. She was 9 months pregnant in that picture! I know she has been lurking around my blog for quite a while. I hope this gets a comment!) I love me some 'Ssippi!

What is that??!?

Well it has finally happened! My baby has his first pimple. I can't handle it. Puberty is just around the corner. I can hear it calling his name. Sniff!

Friday, May 9, 2008

Lyrics Quiz

I got this from Barely Keeping it all Together. A very fun way for Paint boy and I to spend a Friday night. We have a HUGE music library. It is crazy, everything from a million genres. Paint Boy loves his Tunes. (So much that in college , he didn't have a TV. Just a BIG stereo.)

I actually only used my play list so that it wouldn't get too crazy.


Step 1: Put your I-Pod on random

Step 2: Post the first line from the first 25 songs that play, no matter how embarrassing the song.

Step 3: Here’s the fun part: YOU get to guess what song it is from just the one line; if you’re really good, you’ll know the artist as well!

Step 4: I'll color line when someone gets it right, linking to that someone, cause I’m nice like that.

Step 5: No cheating! And by cheating, I mean no looking them up on Google or any other search engine.

1. Ain't no doubt, we are here to party. Come on out, got to get it started.

2.With one light on, in one room. I know your up when I get home.

3.Don't want to be crippled and cracked. Shoulders, legs, knees and back.

4.What did you do? What did you say? Did you walk or did you run away?

5.Dark in the city, Night is a wire. Steam in the subway, oh there's a fire. doo, doo, doo... Mad About Plaid- Hungry like the Wolf, Duran Duran

6.No time left for you, on my way to better things. I found myself some wings. Distant roads are calling me.

7.I would've given you all of my heart, but there is someone whose torn it apart. Afro- The First Cut is the Deepest, Sheryl Crow and Rod Stewart ( both came up on the I Pod)

8.She seemed dressed in all of me, stretched across all my shame. All the torment and the pain, leaked through and covered me.

9.Now if your feeling kinda low, about the dues you've been payin'. The future's coming much too slow

10.I have visions, I am in them. I was looking into the mirror.To see a little bit clearer...Afro- Paranoia, Green Day

11. I am on the corner of Main Street, just tryin' to keep it in line. You say you want to move on, you say I'm falling behind.

12. Called you so many times today and I guess its all true what your girlfriends say.

13.You're not shy, you've been around. You want to fly, don't want your feet on the ground. Mad About Plaid- Urgent, Foreigner

14.She packed my bags last night, preflight. Zero out, 9 am. Afro- Rocket Man, Elton John

15.Trying hard to speak and fighting with my weak hand. Driven to distraction, so part of the plan.

16.She's got a smile that seems to me, reminds me of childhood memories. Afro- Sweet Child of Mine, Guns and Roses

17.Friday night and the lights are low, looking out for a place to go. Impoverished Preppy- Dancing Queen, ABBA

18. Smack, crack, bush whack. Tie another one to the rack. Baby...

19. Wooooo, whoooo, my love, she throws like a rubber ball.

20. So this ain't the end, I saw you again. Today, I had to turn my heart away.

21. She eyes me like a Pisces, when I am weak.

22. I'm not the one that's so far away, when I feel the snakebite enter my veins. Never did I want to be here again and I don't remember why I came.

23. I grew up just west of the tracks. Holdin' me to hold me back, around your door, she's calling out my name.

24. I'm no Barbie doll, I'm not your baby girl. I've done ugly things, I have made mistakes.

25 . He's making all these promises you know he cannot keep. He made me pick him up, now he won't pay for gasoline. ( if any of you get this one I will send you a copy of the Cd! NO CHEATING)

What Next? ( The boys saw #3 on Thursday), Beach Bunny (Drug Boy saw #11), ACE (we saw #24 together), 'Ssippi girl, June and PM (Presidential Madame) grab your husbands and play along. Paint boy said that it was a team sport! I want answers, you can do it!

ETA- Am I going to have to give y'all the answers? This is not that difficult- anyone that went to a SEC college in the late 80's early 90's knows #23. Put you beer goggles on and think!

Tuesday, May 6, 2008

S-U-M-M-E-R Swap

I love your whole face is hosting a SUMMER swap. I love these things! I get just as much from the shopping, as I do from the box of happies I recieve. Where else can you send and recieve $20 worth of sunshine?

Sign up quick, you only have until 5/9.

T-Ball Tournaments are serious!

Last night was the beginning of Tournament Time at the ball park!
Both boys had games- C at 6pm and J at 7:15.
C's game got off to a bad start. The opening pitcher looked like he didn't want to be there. Literally. Moping around, asking when they could leave. The game hadn't even started!
There is a 5 run limit, so he gave the other team 5 runs and walked off the plate. He went up to bat and stood there as 3 strikes went right by him. As he was walking off the field he looked at his Dad and said, "Are you ready to go yet?" They packed his bag and drove out of the park. Not a word to the coaches. The worst part is that every time he came up in the batting order, it was an automatic out. Of course they lost, 8 to 4. So sad!

J's game was very exciting! One of the Mom's embroidered hang towels for all the boys. We used them as rally towels for the game. The boys loved seeing all the red towels spinning in the air. There were cowbells and tambourines. Thank heavens for little sisters, they were having a blast dancing and shaking the music makers.
J caught a pop fly and almost had a double play at second. He also got 2 boys out, by catching a ball and tagging them as they ran by. This doesn't sound like much unless you have been to a t-ball game. We had to go for ice cream it was so impressive.
Here is where the rant is going to start- DO NOT WEAR SWEATSHORTS WITH WORDS ON YOUR BUTT, IF YOU COACH T-BALL! The other team's coach was a cute blonde. Maybe mid 20's. She had words written on her butt. The teenage umpires couldn't focus. The kindergarteners were trying to read it. It was not what we usually see at our park.
We ended up losing the game. The last inning the umpire ended our turn with 2 outs, because he was so busy looking at Blondie's butt. Just kidding, kinda.

BTW- That is the cute coach of J's team. Not Paint boy.

Monday, May 5, 2008

Miss Me?

I know y'all were wondering where I have been hiding. It is not often that I don't post for 3 days. I have too much running through my head to wait that long.

Friday was the 2nd Art Walk. It was a huge success! There were tons of people on the Square and we gave out 17,000 Gift Bags! Just kidding, that was a joke for magsterpie. For those of you new to this. The Art Walk is a free event the first Friday of every month from 5-8pm. 25 shops or restaurants- visit 10 and come to the Gallery to pick up prize bag. We also have snacks and wine. Lots of wine. The bags are getting better every month. This month the included gourmet popcorn, cookies, cute key chains, a bookmark, notepads, 17,000 coupons and a print from Paint boy. Pretty fabulous for a free event!

Saturday and Sunday was the Spring Arts Festival on the Square.

Paint boy
decided to pick his work from the Gallery up and plop it down right there in the Square. It was like a traveling circus on Saturday morning during set-up time. Back and forth to the gallery. "I need one more thing." That man can make you tired with all his creativity!

Thank heaven I had coffee. I also had my favorite breakfast from Sugar Cakes. It is the most yummy cafe/bakery. You must try it if you haven't been. (The owner used to be the pastry chef at the Ritz.)Everything is beautiful and tastes divine. The prices will amaze you after you take your first bite of a perfectly flaky pastry. I could lick the crumbs off his ever present chef's coat! We take the boys for brunch a couple times a month. I was happy to spend the weekend a stones throw from great coffee and pastry.

We had a great time meeting people and seeing friends.

We had the best time, I just had to be a "Little Ray of Sunshine" when the rains fell on Saturday, but I finally got him out of his funk when the skies cleared.
Sunday, the Sun was shining and the crowds came. I am sporting the most awesome Farmer's Tan you have ever seen. I might need to rename it because farmers don't have jewelry lines on each wrist and flip flop lines either. The crowd wasn't exactly in the purchasing mood, according to all the artists around us; but Paint Boy sold a number of pieces. It was a great way for people that "have been meaning to get by" to actually see his work. He got excellent feedback and can't wait to do another of these shows.

Ever since I started working on the Mistletoe Market and then chaired it; I have said that "when I grow up and stop doing hair, I want to travel around and do shows." I love everything about Art shows. The crowds, the food and the shopping. Now I have found my purpose, they won't be JL shows but I will still get to have fun. We are already planning all the Fall shows "in side the perimeter" and a few elsewhere.

The funniest thing kept happening on Sunday.

There were several pieces that everyone gravitated toward. Couples would come into the booth and the wife would look at her husband and beg with her eyes to have one. The would leave the booth after 10 minutes or so and have very heated discussions on the street out front. They would then walk away with the man shaking his head "No." If the man wanted a piece there was very little discussion, just a credit card presented.

Paint boy had never seen anything like it.
PB- What is going on?
HG- A Shopping Cock Block.
PB- I know what a cock block is, but not what it had to do with shopping.
HG- With most couples, if a husband wants something it gets purchased and if a wife wants something she has to have permission.
(as you can see, since he didn't understand, that it doesn't happen in our house.)

He was floored that all these "Cocks were blocking his sales." He decided that from now on Arts Festivals should be women only events. Bring your credit cards and leave the husbands at home!
There is one more reason why I love this guy and now I am off to shop! he, he

ETA- Is that better AFRO? I was never an English major nor worked for a newspaper. I am just a lowly Hair Girl, that likes to ramble.

Thursday, May 1, 2008

Pay for your own vaca

I live in a fabulous Southern town. There are at least 12 MEGA churches within 10 miles of my home. For those of you not in the know- Mega churches have thousands of members. I don't mean 1000; I mean 3-10,000 members. We are called the Bible Belt for a reason. I attend a Mega Church. I love that there are so many activities for the kids, so many choices for Sunday school, multiple service times and 1000's of people. It is easy to blend if you like or stand out if you choose. I was raised in a small (re. couple hundred members) church and EVERYONE knew your business. All the kids at my church went to the same High School and 2 of us went somewhere else. For Youth group I went where my friends from school went, but Sunday morning my butt was sitting next to Mom. I like going to a big church.
I do not enjoy the multitude of letters that I have started receiving to date. I call them the "Mission Letters". These letters are coming from friends/clients all over town. They are mass mailing that come from a teenager or family asking me to pay for them to go on an exotic Mission trip. I am all for Missions. DO NOT GET ME WRONG. I just have an issue when a family with small children, that lives in a $500,000+ home, with a stay at home mom; wants me to send them money to take their kids to Belize! I will not send money to send you to Paris to witness on the street corners. I will not send you money to swim with dolphins in Australia. I will not support your Vacation fund. I am all for you going, I know that we need to reach out to people all over the world. I would like for you to pay your own way.
I am the first to donate when a Youth group asks for a silent auction item. I will buy your BBQ. I will pay you to wash my car. I will buy raffle tickets for whatever. I would like to see you "working" for it. The work shows me that you really want to go and serve. The effort in year long, group wide, fund raising shows commitment. A mass mailing shows that me that you want an easy way out.
I believe that children should be doing mission work. My boys have cleaned yards, made sack lunches and played with children while their father and I served. It is all done locally. There are a million opportunities around every corner to show your small children how to give back. You do not need to take them around the world to do it. Especially not on my dime.